Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
