after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Floor bacon is actually really good
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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