1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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