is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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