I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
