The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
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