found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I just want nice things and good sex
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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