Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Randomize
