I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I could fuck to npr.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
