when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Threesome in a minivan. New low
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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