Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
