Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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