i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Randomize