Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
