Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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