I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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