How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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