no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
