I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize