I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
