Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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