He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
