Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
