How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Are we still banned from the library?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I made him laugh his dick is mine
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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