There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize