Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
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