What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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