fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Randomize