hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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