Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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