He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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