That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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