he shaved USA in his pubs
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
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