Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Randomize
