You really coming over, don't trick.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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