Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
