I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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