She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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