That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
