I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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