He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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