Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
