the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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