I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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