that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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