i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
