Just cropdusted the office
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
