Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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