in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
