whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
