You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
