READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
